Keep Your Chin Up (and Toss in a Stiff Upper Lip)

Just five years ago, when I wrote this cosmetic surgery don’t ask, don’t tell  Newsday feature, the top five surgical procedures for women were:

  1. Breast augmentation
  2. Liposuction
  3. Eyelid surgery
  4. Abdominoplasty (tummy tucks)
  5. Breast reduction

It’s a telling list — with the exception of #1, there was stuff we wanted removed from all parts of our bodies.   Now, we’re into add-ons.  According to the American Society of Plastic Surgeons, chin implants — or “chinplants,” as we trendsetters refer to them —  are the fastest growing plastic surgery procedures going on, up 71 percent since last year.  Rumor has it that celebubore Paris Hilton had a jaw-and-jowl job recently. And I hear American Idolprentice Clay Aiken has been leading his team by the red hairs of his new chinny-chin-chin.

Aside from chin ups, we’re bloating our lips up 49 percent more than in 2010 and plumping our cheeks by 47 percent.

So what of the rhytidectomy? The good-old-fashioned facelift, increasing by a measly 5 percent, is facing an epic PR crisis.  Who should be the spokesperson…?

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